A decade ago I knew EVERYTHING about computers. Well, at least everything that a pre-pubescent teen could know about. Not anymore. Today, I sit here typing on my uber Windows 98 computer - the one which my dad and brother decided to give me once they bought better computers for themselves...how generous. You know your computer is out of date when Microsoft goes "we will not be producing anymore updates for Windows 98". You also know it's out of date when you can't play two thirds of the videos on the internet because it uses a Windows Media Player that's too advanced for your ageing box of wires and electronics. Furthermore, you know it's time to get a new computer when it comes up with an error screen, in response to pressing a key to get rid of the previous error screen, which in turn was also in response to get rid of the previous error screen, and the result is that it doesn't even respond when you ask it to reboot itself.
And so I've decided to browse through some computers. I'm not sure I'll buy it just yet though. I might work for a bit so that I won't go into debt so early. The cost of this BEAST of a laptop computer I want complete with a processor that can process quicker than a speed camera can calculate the speed of my brother driving on the freeway, a video card that makes Finding Nemo look outdated, and RAM that enables the computer to multi-task better than any female in the world, is ~$5.5k :( Alternatively I can get one at half the price but then I won't be able to fulfil my role as a stay-at-home geek that wastes his life away playing computer games. So the options are:
1) Buy a cheaper one and thus not be able to play computer games. Hence I'll get out more, spending more spare boredom time exercising or going out with friends. My social life will be healthy and I'll give myself a better chance of finding a special lady friend. I'll also save up to $3k which I could use to invest in a corporate logging company but also donate to a fund that's saving an endangered species of snail to please my guilty conscience.
2) Buy this beast of a computer and watch as my posture becomes worse, my health deteriorate, my social life die, and respond to my depressing loneliness by befriending four "online girlfriends" simultaneously - two from Canada, one from Sweden, and one who is actually a 67 year old male paedophile that I ignorantly believe to be a "hot, sexy 24 year old 5'9 brunette with size C breasts"
Hmmm....I'll take option 2!!!
